All posts by M.J.

479: The Song “They That Trust”

This is mark Joseph “young” blog entry #479, on the subject of The Song “They That Trust”.

The only reason I recorded this song is that when I wrote it I wanted to have a version I could play for Tyler Chroniger.  Becky Patterson had just joined 7db, and I really wrote this to feature her singing.  Tyler didn’t care for it, and I think Becky never heard it.

I expect that part of the problem is that this vocals over midi instruments recording is not very good.  Shame on me, I think I psyched myself out, because I had written the top vocal for Becky and therefore imagined that it was high.  It was only an A, and I sang that high all the time comfortably, but because I was thinking in terms of her singing it, I struggled for it.  On the other hand, I’ve never been able to decide whether I like the song.  The guitar and bass interaction is supposed to give it something of a rock sound, but it comes across as very much a pop song, I think.

They That Trust.

So here are the lyrics.

Oh, they that trust in the Lord,
Oh, they that trust in the Lord shall renew,
Oh, they that trust in the Lord, shall renew their strength.
And they shall mount up on wings,
And they shall mount up on wings of eagles,
And they shall mount up on wings, mount on eagle’s wings.

Oh, they that trust in the Lord,
Oh, they that trust in the Lord shall renew,
Oh, they that trust in the Lord shall renew their love.
And they shall love each other,
And they shall love each other as He loved,
And they shall love each other as He first loved us.

Trust in the Lord, not your own understanding–
That is the place to start.
Follow the way that the Lord is commanding.
Trust Him with all your heart.

Oh, they that trust in the Lord,
Oh, they that trust in the Lord shall renew,
Oh, they that trust in the Lord shall renew their joy.
And they shall sing His praises,
And they shall sing His praises forever,
And they shall sing His praises–sing forever more.

Hallelujah, Hallelujah,
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah.

*****

Previous web log song posts:

#301:  The Song “Holocaust” | #307:  The Song “Time Bomb” | #311:  The Song “Passing Through the Portal” | #314:  The Song “Walkin’ In the Woods” | #317:  The Song “That’s When I’ll Believe” | #320:  The Song “Free” | #322:  The Song “Voices” | #326:  The Song “Mountain, Mountain” | #328:  The Song “Still Small Voice” | #334:  The Song “Convinced” | #337:  The Song “Selfish Love” | #340:  The Song “A Man Like Paul” | #341:  The Song “Joined Together” | #346:  The Song “If We Don’t Tell Them” | #349: The Song “I Can’t Resist You’re Love” | #353:  The Song “I Use to Think” | #356:  The Song “God Said It Is Good” | #362:  The Song “My Life to You” | #366:  The Song “Sometimes” | #372:  The Song “Heavenly Kingdom” | #378:  The Song “A Song of Joy” | #382:  The Song “Not Going to Notice” | #387:  The Song “Our God Is Good” | #393:  The Song “Why” | #399:  The Song “Look Around You” | #404:  The Song “Love’s the Only Command” | #408:  The Song “Given You My Name” | #412:  The Song “When I Think” | #414:  The Song “You Should Have Thanked Me” | #428:  The Song “To the Victor” | #433:  The Song “From Job” | #436:  The Song “Trust Him Again” | #438:  The Song “Even You” | #441:  The Song “Fork in the Road” | #442:  The Song “Call to Worship” | #445:  The Song “How Many Times” | #447:  The Song “When I Was Lonely” | #450:  The Song “Rainy Days” | #453:  The Song “Never Alone” | #455:  The Song “King of Glory” | #457:  The Song “Greater Love” | #458:  The Song “All I Need” | #462:  The Song “John Three” | #464:  The Song “The Secret” | #466:  The Song “In a Mirror Dimly” | #468:  The Song “Present Your Bodies” | #471:  The Song “Walkin'” | #473:  The Song “In the Light of His Love” | #477:  The Song “Step by Step”

Next song: To the Philadelphians.

478: Character Conflicts

This is mark Joseph “young” blog entry #478, on the subject of Character Conflicts.

With permission of Valdron Inc I have previously completed publishing my first nine Multiverser novels,

  1. Verse Three, Chapter One:  The First Multiverser Novel,
  2. Old Verses New,
  3. For Better or Verse,
  4. Spy Verses,
  5. Garden of Versers,
  6. Versers Versus Versers,
  7. Re Verse All,
  8. In Verse Proportion, and
  9. Con Verse Lea,

in serialized form on the web (those links will take you to the table of contents for each book).  Along with each book there was also a series of web log posts looking at the writing process, the decisions and choices that delivered the final product; those posts are indexed with the chapters in the tables of contents pages.  Now as I am posting the tenth, In Version,  written in collaboration with Eric R. Ashley, I am again offering a set of “behind the writings” insights.  This “behind the writings” look may contain spoilers because it sometimes talks about my expectations for the futures of the characters and stories–although it sometimes raises ideas that were never pursued, as being written partially concurrently with the story it sometimes discusses where I thought it was headed.  You might want to read the referenced chapters before reading this look at them.  Links below (the section headings) will take you to the specific individual chapters being discussed, and there are (or will soon be) links on those pages to bring you back hopefully to the same point here.

This is the second post for this novel, covering chapters 13 through 24.  The first post, #476:  Versers Deduce, covered chapters 1 through 12.  There is also a section of the site, Multiverser Novel Support Pages, in which I have begun to place materials related to the novels beginning with character papers for the major characters, giving them at different stages as they move through the books.

These were originally written entirely third-person, that is, both Eric and I were “he”.  Since the viewpoint characters were also always “he” in this book, that became very confusing, so I attempted to shift it back to “I/me/mine” for my contributions and “he/him/his” for Eric’s.  This was a rather late decision in the process, and hopefully I got them all.

History of the series, including the reason it started, the origins of character names and details, and many of the ideas, are in earlier posts, and won’t be repeated here.

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Quick links to discussions in this page:
Chapter 13, Kondor 225
Chapter 14, Beam 163
Chapter 15, Brown 248
Chapter 16, Slade 217
Chapter 17, Beam 164
Chapter 18, Brown 249
Chapter 19, Slade 218
Chapter 20, Kondor 226
Chapter 21, Beam 165
Chapter 22, Slade 219
Chapter 23, Brown 250
Chapter 24, Beam 166

Chapter 13, K225

At this point I converted the novel file itself and this supplement to *.docx format and uploaded the revised copies to Google Drive.  These words were a test to see whether I was able to work with the documents in Google Docs, before sharing them with Eric.  It appears that the answer is yes.

I had been contemplating what I could do with this, and it struck me that it was possible that the aliens weren’t interested in either contact or conquest, but were simply xenobiologists or the equivalent of anthropologists studying alien civilizations.  That gave somewhere to go here, and the rest I came up with while trying to get there.

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Chapter 14, Beam 163

Eric joined in a bit here.  I wanted some more flavor to the zombie world so Eric came up with a foodie-obsessed culture with some advanced bioengineering skills–at least enough to make crude chimera.  He’s trying to fit in with my style, to a large degree, but bring his own as well, which is a good exercise as a writer.

We had a bit of a dead end, as Eric created a very dramatic scene in which Turbirb’durpa ate one of the parasites and became infected and attacked Bron.  We agreed that that was a bad direction, and deleted it.

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Chapter 15, Brown 248

Eric wrote the first draft of this chapter, and the Slade chapter which followed.  It took the book in a direction I had not anticipated, and there was a lot of discussion on it.

When I was going over it to edit it, I felt strongly that there should be a chapter break when Derek leaves the house to go to the hangar; originally the next part was a continuation of the same chapter.  That created the problem that in the next chapter Slade reacts to events that were being moved–but this was resolved by also splitting that into two chapters, and placing a Beam chapter between the end of it and the return of Derek.

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Chapter 16, Slade 217

Comments on the decision to split what Eric originally drafted into two chapters were just made in connection with Brown 248.

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Chapter 17, Beam 164

One of the issues in the Beam story was how he was going to juggle his two jealous wives.  Thus the sleeping arrangements were a significant problem, and I thought about them for quite a while.  I also thought Beam was sharp enough to placate Sophia before dallying with Ashleigh.

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Chapter 18, Brown 249

Again, this was the second half of what was originally drafted as Brown 248, split off to create better story flow.  The combat is all Eric’s work.

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Chapter 19, Slade 218

This was the second half of what was Slade 217, written by Eric.  I changed one of the prayers.

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Chapter 20, Kondor 226

At this point I proposed the subjects of this plus two more chapters, to go from Joe taking care of Derek (who, it occurred to me, was currently Morach) to something happening with Beam, possibly the appearance of a herd of cattle, to Slade’s confrontation with the “Big Guy”.

I made more of bringing them together than I had expected, so cut it short and decided to pick up the next chapter, maybe Kondor or maybe Brown, with treatment of the wound.

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Chapter 21, Beam 165

I wrote the opening of this chapter, but left it hanging without resolving what Beam would cook; Eric took over and added the descent into the basement.  However, he had Beam take only Ashleigh, and I could not imagine Beam not taking his sorceress with the light spell.  I personally don’t like candlelight–I feel like I can’t see beyond the candle, and it does more to make me visible than to illuminate anything–so I nixed that.

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Chapter 22, Slade 219

Eric specifically suggested I write this fight scene, but it had a few complications.  There was no reason to imagine that the “Big Guy” had a sword, so Eric suggested a gunfight; but the only gun Slade carries is his kinetic blaster, damaging +2DC makes it lethal, one hit could kill most ordinary people.  It doesn’t have a recorded repeat factor, but it fires twenty shots fully charged.  That made it challenging.

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Chapter 23, Brown 250

I wanted the medical treatment to be realistic despite the use of the futuristic medical kit.  I almost forgot the leg, which is why it’s last, but to excuse it once he turned into Morach he didn’t use it all that much.

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Chapter 24, Beam 166

I wrote the opening paragraphs trying to capture Beam’s thoughts and feelings, but then passed it to Eric to continue from his door-opening cliffhanger.

This was Eric’s story, but it was largely his second story, as I had a lot of trouble with the first one.  Both of us edited it several times before we were really satisfied, and we left it as an open problem for a future chapter.

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This has been the second behind-the-writings look at In Version.  If there is interest and continued support from readers we will endeavor to continue with more behind-the-writings posts and another novel.

#477: The Song “Step by Step”

This is mark Joseph “young” blog entry #477, on the subject of The Song “Step by Step”.

This is undoubtedly the longest song yet published, and I do not anticipate posting a longer one.  Yet it is a good old-style rock song with an interesting story behind it.  The dramatic opening moves into the slow pounding forward movement which eventually segues through gentle voices into the frantic cadenza building to a climax that brings it back to the beginning, and a denouement capturing the first part as the last.

Part of that story was already told in web log post #462:  John Three (linked below).  There I tell about how Jeffrey Robert Zurheide and I started writing a rock opera.  This song is primarily sung by the commander of the soldiers who nailed Jesus to the cross, although there are parts (in very operatic style) attributed to John the Baptist and the Prophets and to The Church.  It also contains several instrumental stretches including a drum solo, although this recording is another vocals over midi instruments work.  Although I wrote it alone, I incorporated scraps of melody from at least one piece that Jeffrey had written, the Carpenter’s Song melody at the end.

My impetus for recording it was that a paper copy of the lyrics with chords would not preserve the intricacy at all.  When I originally wrote it, at Gordon College probably in the spring of 1976, I recorded it in my dorm room using a Sony reel-to-reel deck that let me record one channel while playing the other, but that tape had been lost, so having the software to do so I reproduced it.  I have often thought that the second half of the section given to the Voice of the Church should break into SATB, but I’ve never taken the time to draft that.

It has a lot of excellent images, although at least one part I always liked turns out to be historically inaccurate (they did not drop crosses into sockets; they nailed criminals to the crossbar and hoisted it onto the scaffold, then affixed the feet).  But the picture of the steps throbbing in the brain of the soldier, the phrase “Jesus walked to the cross” suggesting that it was voluntary, and the notion of the earthquake waiting for Him to nod His head as a cue, have always struck me as gems.  (I had probably heard the notion that walking to the cross was voluntary before this, but it was worth including.)

When I played it for Jeff, he was thrown at the end, because when I sang “Today we killed a carpenter” he thought it was the carpenter he’d invented at the beginning who, in fairness, I’d brought back into the story in the song sung by Caiaphas.  I thought that connecting the carpenters together gave some cohesion to the song.

Step by Step.

So here are the lyrics.

(John the Baptist and the Prophets)

Behold the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world.

(Soldier)

Step by step He walked to the hill.
His shredded back was bleeding still.
Step by step He carried the cross;
I felt so helpless, so blind, so lost.

Step by step He plodded along,
This man in whom we found nothing wrong.
Step by step He came to die.
I had the feeling only He knew why.

Somehow I think He died for me;
Can’t you see, He took my place?
I should have been nailed to that tree;
Instead, I spit in His face.

Somehow I think He died for me;
Can’t you see, He took my place?
I should have been nailed to that tree;
Instead, I spit in His face.

Step by step–it stays with me yet.
This was a man like none I had met.
Step by step, it throbs in my brain.
How could this man bear so much pain?

(Voice of the Church)

And Jesus walked to the cross–
He didn’t have to do it,
But He thought of me
As He faced that tree,
And for my life He went through it.
Jesus walked to the cross–
One little word would have saved Him,
But His love was why
Jesus chose to die.
The cross was mine, but He gave Himself for me.

He died for me.  (Repeat and under)

(Soldier)

Somehow I think He died for me;
Can’t you see, He took my place?
I should have been nailed to that tree;
Instead, I spit in His face.
I felt so guilty as I watched Him walk along,
And He was still alive–He must have been remarkably strong,
But any minute I was sure that He would fall–
We beat Him so hard, I’m surprised He walked at all–
And so I grabbed a man who stood beside the road
And made him carry Jesus’ awful, awful, awful load,
And made him carry Jesus’ awful load, but what can I say?
I thought I was the one who should have led the way
To take the cross, to die myself, to set Him free,
To bear the cross on which this Jesus died for me.
The cross He bore–I felt it was my own,
But one man just can’t stand alone
Against the people and against the rulers at the top
And tell them all they’re wrong, tell them to stop, stop, stop, stop, stop–

Stop this madness, stop this madness,
Can’t you see you’re plunging us in darkness and sadness?
But still we nailed Him to the cross, and dropped it in the socket,
And grumbled that His garment didn’t have a pocket;
But I did give Him a drink before He died.
When He was dead, I plunged my sword in his side,
I don’t know why–somehow I knew that He was dead.
When He died, He prayed, then He dropped His head,
Then came the earthquake, yes, it seems it waited for His nod.
Surely this man had to be the Son of God.
Oh, tell me Jesus, tell me, please tell me why,
Why did we hate you, why did we beat you, why did we crucify?

(John the Baptist and the Prophets)

Behold the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world.

(Soldier)
Today we killed a carpenter–I guess I don’t know why.
Can someone tell me why this Jesus had to die?
He’d been a nuisance, and we’d fin’ly had enough.
But for a righteous man, we sure did treat Him rough.
We bit and spit on Him, we acted just like swine,
And yet it seemed that He forgave us for our crime.
I meant to ask Him to explain some things He’d said.
I’m kind of sorry that the carpenter is dead.

(All)

Step by step.

*****

Previous web log song posts:

#301:  The Song “Holocaust” | #307:  The Song “Time Bomb” | #311:  The Song “Passing Through the Portal” | #314:  The Song “Walkin’ In the Woods” | #317:  The Song “That’s When I’ll Believe” | #320:  The Song “Free” | #322:  The Song “Voices” | #326:  The Song “Mountain, Mountain” | #328:  The Song “Still Small Voice” | #334:  The Song “Convinced” | #337:  The Song “Selfish Love” | #340:  The Song “A Man Like Paul” | #341:  The Song “Joined Together” | #346:  The Song “If We Don’t Tell Them” | #349: The Song “I Can’t Resist You’re Love” | #353:  The Song “I Use to Think” | #356:  The Song “God Said It Is Good” | #362:  The Song “My Life to You” | #366:  The Song “Sometimes” | #372:  The Song “Heavenly Kingdom” | #378:  The Song “A Song of Joy” | #382:  The Song “Not Going to Notice” | #387:  The Song “Our God Is Good” | #393:  The Song “Why” | #399:  The Song “Look Around You” | #404:  The Song “Love’s the Only Command” | #408:  The Song “Given You My Name” | #412:  The Song “When I Think” | #414:  The Song “You Should Have Thanked Me” | #428:  The Song “To the Victor” | #433:  The Song “From Job” | #436:  The Song “Trust Him Again” | #438:  The Song “Even You” | #441:  The Song “Fork in the Road” | #442:  The Song “Call to Worship” | #445:  The Song “How Many Times” | #447:  The Song “When I Was Lonely” | #450:  The Song “Rainy Days” | #453:  The Song “Never Alone” | #455:  The Song “King of Glory” | #457:  The Song “Greater Love” | #458:  The Song “All I Need” | #462:  The Song “John Three” | #464:  The Song “The Secret” | #466:  The Song “In a Mirror Dimly” | #468:  The Song “Present Your Bodies” | #471:  The Song “Walkin'” | #473:  The Song “In the Light of His Love”

Next song: They That Trust

#476: Versers Deduce

This is mark Joseph “young” blog entry #476, on the subject of Versers Deduce.

With permission of Valdron Inc I have previously completed publishing my first nine Multiverser novels,

  1. Verse Three, Chapter One:  The First Multiverser Novel,
  2. Old Verses New,
  3. For Better or Verse,
  4. Spy Verses,
  5. Garden of Versers,
  6. Versers Versus Versers,
  7. Re Verse All,
  8. In Verse Proportion, and
  9. Con Verse Lea,

in serialized form on the web (those links will take you to the table of contents for each book).  Along with each book there was also a series of web log posts looking at the writing process, the decisions and choices that delivered the final product; those posts are indexed with the chapters in the tables of contents pages.  Now as I am posting the tenth, In Version,  written in collaboration with Eric R. Ashley, I am again offering a set of “behind the writings” insights.  This “behind the writings” look may contain spoilers because it sometimes talks about my expectations for the futures of the characters and stories–although it sometimes raises ideas that were never pursued, as being written partially concurrently with the story it sometimes discusses where I thought it was headed.  You might want to read the referenced chapters before reading this look at them.  Links below (the section headings) will take you to the specific individual chapters being discussed, and there are (or will soon be) links on those pages to bring you back hopefully to the same point here.

This is the first post for this novel, covering chapters 1 through 12.  There is also a section of the site, Multiverser Novel Support Pages, in which I have begun to place materials related to the novels beginning with character papers for the major characters, giving them at different stages as they move through the books.

These were originally written entirely third-person, that is, both Eric and I were “he”.  Since the viewpoint characters were also always “he” in this book, that became very confusing, so I attempted to shift it back to “I/me/mine” for my contributions and “he/him/his” for Eric’s.  This was a rather late decision in the process, and hopefully I got them all.

History of the series, including the reason it started, the origins of character names and details, and many of the ideas, are in earlier posts, and won’t be repeated here.

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Quick links to discussions in this page:
Chapter 1, Slade 214
Chapter 2, Beam 158
Chapter 3, Kondor 223
Chapter 4, Brown 246
Chapter 5, Beam 159
Chapter 6, Slade 215
Chapter 7, Beam 160
Chapter 8, Kondor 224
Chapter 9, Brown 247
Chapter 10, Beam 161
Chapter 11, Slade 216
Chapter 12, Beam 162

Chapter 1, Slade 214

The title problem resolved itself before I had even chosen whose chapter was first.  I recognized that I was starting with a continuation of the story of the parakeet people facing an alien invasion, started with Bob and Shella Slade, Joe Kondor and Zeke Smith, and Derek and Vashti Brown, in In Verse Proportion (the Slades actually arrived in Versers Versus Versers, but barely started in that world), and that I could use the title In Version to suggest that this was a return to that story.

Meanwhile, there were good reasons to want to bring someone else into this.  The big one was that if all three of my viewpoint characters were going to be in the same universe for a while, I was going to need a way to get another story going, and that meant another character.  I had decided to keep Lauren’s location a mystery for a while, partly because I wasn’t certain what to do with her myself, partly because I was considering retiring her, so it wouldn’t be her.  I similarly was uncertain what direction to go with Tommy, but didn’t see much excitement in her story.  Beam, though, was definitely at a cliffhanger, and although I had failed to find answers to a lot of questions about his world, I had finished his character sheet from the last book, and was progressing rapidly with those of his companions, so I felt ready to tackle it.

That left the question of which character should start this.  I wanted to delay Beam for the second chapter, partly because it would give me another couple days to finish the character sheets for his companions, and partly because he had been the main spotlight character in the previous book Con Verse Lea so an extra chapter’s delay would be good.  Slade was commended, not merely because he was the character longest out of the spotlight, however briefly (In Verse Proportion ends Slade, Kondor, Brown), but because his expectation of battle would probably give more tension to start the book than the hopes for peace his companions had.

The critical parts of this first chapter had to be to bring readers up to speed on what had been happening at the end of In Verse Proportion, including introducing the central characters and their situation.  Doing it from Slade’s perspective once again enabled me to create the expectation of the war.

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Chapter 2, Beam 158

I expected this to be the most anticipated story continuation, as I had left Beam fleeing from some unknown pursuer in what was from a publication standpoint about three chapters back at the end of Con Verse Lea.  Although I had had some time to consider what to do, I hadn’t come up with much yet.

I decided that the next step was to get Beam’s party to a building they could fortify and defend, and to give more exposition on the nature of the enemy.  I was about to write more about how the idea that they were biological zombies would give Beam thoughts on what to do, but decided to push that to the next chapter to give the feeling that Beam had thought about it for at least a few minutes before reaching conclusions.

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Chapter 3, Kondor 223

I chose Kondor next mainly because Derek had been the viewpoint character of the last chapter written about the trio, but also because I figured he might have a breakthrough that would advance things and make anything I could at this moment think of for Joe somewhat moot.

As I developed the thought about Zeke detecting radio transmissions but being unable to decipher them, the idea of radio guidance systems came to mind, and I went forward from there.

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Chapter 4, Brown 246

I wasn’t sure how far or fast to move this.  Understanding the alien communications is the first step, but it’s not going to be a simple one.  On the one hand it shouldn’t happen too fast; on the other hand, it shouldn’t hold up the story.

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Chapter 5, Beam 159

I had several notions for this chapter, and moved through them quickly.

When Beam says “I wish I was that clever” I had originally and correctly typed “were”, but decided that Beam’s use of English is not precise enough to know that the subjunctive is the proper form there, and in the vernacular people would say “was”, so I changed it immediately.

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Chapter 6, Slade 215

I decided that the best next step for Slade was for him to teach his fighting students how to use the newly-developed firearms.  I had to determine two things, one was how many students there were, and the other was what kind of firearms were available.

On the first question, I was sent back to re-read multiple chapters of In Verse Proportion to see what had been said about the class.  It was sketchy; they had been referred to as a group.  Because they easily paired off, there had to be an even number.  Slade once commented that getting through all of them but the two best would take a long time, but he intended to spar against them individually until about half way through when he took them two at a time.  My feeling was that twenty would mean ten pairs, but when you want things to appear random you avoid round numbers not because they don’t happen randomly but because they aren’t expected to.  That meant either eighteen or twenty-two, and I went with eighteen.  Adding Slade and the combat professor to the group would make it twenty, and twenty guns made sense.

As to the types of guns, I sort of wanted automatic pistols, but decided they were probably a bit too complicated for the birds to have developed so soon.  They could do revolvers, and some kind of automatic reloading rifles.  It made sense to do both, but one at a time.  I decided on a revolver comparable to the Smith & Wesson.

I also realized that they wouldn’t have ear protection at this point, but they would have something like cotton.

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Chapter 7, Beam 160

I had marked this as a Kondor chapter, but couldn’t get started on it.  Part of that was I was still finishing the second stage character papers from Con Verse Lea, but part of it was simply that I didn’t know what to do with Joe and Zeke at this moment.  So I changed it to Beam, since his story was moving forward.

I decided that there would be too many windows to reinforce all of them, but that if the previous residents had survived any length of time they would have taken reasonably effective measures to protect themselves.  At the moment I thought that they ran out of food and the last of them went for provisions and never made it back, but might revise that.

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Chapter 8, Kondor 224

I sat on this for a couple days partly because I was otherwise occupied, but also because I couldn’t quite figure out how to move the story forward from Kondor’s perspective.  The answer finally came, that since the trio are working together Derek’s story could move forward, which was really the main moving piece at the moment, by having Joe at a meeting of the versers.

The story unfolded from the starting point of the versers meeting to compare notes and specifically to learn what Derek had accomplished.  It immediately became apparent that there would be birds there, and that Derek would probably have arranged to have a room suited to small meetings.  It would mostly be the tension between Slade’s and Kondor’s views of the situation at this point, with the complications of learning to communicate fitting into that.

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Chapter 9, Brown 247

Eric Ashley had casually suggested to me maybe a week or so before this that he would like to collaborate on something.  I had asked what, and then the thread was dropped.  He re-initiated it at this point, and we agreed that he would join the efforts on creating this novel.  I was in the process of bringing him up to speed on where it was, how it got here, and where I thought it was going.

I faced the problem at this point that I couldn’t really have Derek contact the aliens yet, and it would be difficult to keep his thread interesting if he didn’t.  But as I pondered this, I decided that one thing in Derek’s character is that belief he has that The King–his name for God from the Sprite world–sends him places to do something, and to this point he hasn’t really thought that much about it here.  So I started in that direction.

In the middle of writing this, I checked an article to confirm my understanding of amplitude modulation and frequency modulation radio and to find out how digital broadcasting works.  What struck me is that somehow Derek has to make a copy of his ship’s radio, and it uses something that is not AM/FM, and something like digital is the only available answer at this point.  I don’t know whether it’s feasible, but he has Joe and Zeke to help him, so maybe.

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Chapter 10, Beam 161

I stopped the chapter short because I wanted the cliffhanger.  I had some very specific notions of what happens next, but felt the need for the tension there.

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Chapter 11, Slade 216

I needed the time to move, and the combat team to improve.  I looked up the names used for Stumbler and Clumsy, because I wanted one of them to be the best shot with a gun, making the team better overall; and I decided it couldn’t really be Clumsy.  Everything else grew organically from the setting.

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Chapter 12, Beam 162

I came back to Beam immediately to deal with the cliffhanger, and I knew what was going to happen in several cases.  The important thing was to show that Beam’s people could deal a lot of damage, but the zombies could take quite a bit as well.  Even so, it was late so I went to bed and didn’t get back to it until late the next night.

After writing this, I ran some of the skills I had attributed to Sophia by Kyler Young, who had created much of the Beam party in Garden of Versers, along with the other attacks on the zombies, and he seemed to agree with what had been suggested.

Eric was getting up to speed on the stories not yet published, and the book was still moving forward without him.

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This has been the first behind-the-writings look at In Version.  If there is interest and continued support from readers we will endeavor to continue with more behind-the-writings posts and another novel.

#475: The Mother of Jairus’ Daughter

This is mark Joseph “young” blog entry #475, on the subject of The Mother of Jairus’ Daughter.

Our Christian Gamers Guild Bible study recently reached Mark 5:22ff, a peculiar passage which begins with Jesus agreeing to go with someone to perform one miracle, healing a dying daughter, and on the way being interrupted to perform another, healing a bleeding woman.  I proposed that the two miracles were more than simply together, that they were connected, and the connection appeared to be that the woman was the mother of the girl.  Someone rightly asked what evidence there was for this, and I realized that would require pulling together a lot of little bits and pieces that might not be significant in themselves but which seem to point to something.

The Raising of Jairus’ Daughter exhibited 1820 Henry Thomson 1773-1843 Presented anonymously 2012 http://www.tate.org.uk/art/work/T13558

In this, it also happened by one of those intriguing coincidences that while I was posting the Mark passage I was simultaneously studying the Luke passage which should post in a couple years; the Matthew passage has already been outlined for posting, so I have been to some degree comparing that in the process.  I thus decided that I ought to put it all together and offer it to you.

I’ll also mention that I did not notice this myself.  One of the most intelligent people I know, the Reverend (now undoubtedly Doctor) David D. Oldham (whom I have known since high school) pointed it out to me.  However, our discussion of it was considerably less detailed, and he left it to me to examine those details.

  1. The fact that we have nested miracles at all is itself unique.  This is the only place in the New Testament where one miracle occurs inside the other.  We might write that off to narrative style, but that all three Synoptic Gospels include the account nested like this–not one of them separates this into two distinct events.
  2. The two miracles are connected by the statement of twelve years.  We are told that the girl was twelve years old in Mark 5:42 and in Luke 8:42; we are similarly told that the woman had been having this flow of blood for twelve years in Mark 5:25, Matthew 9:20, and Luke 8:43.  The juxtaposition in Luke of the two statements being in consecutive verses suggests that he recognized the significance.  Matthew omits the age of the girl, but he truncates the story significantly so although his omission weakens the case, it doesn’t negate it.
  3. The presence of this number is the more significant when you recognize that this story of the dying girl is the only occasion on which we are told the age of the person afflicted.  There were other occasions on which Jesus healed or delivered children, but their age was never given.  That it is given here suggests that it matters.  Yet the only obvious way in which it matters is that it matches the other number.
  4. It is also made more significant in that we are never otherwise told how long someone was afflicted, except in cases in which it was from birth.  Our woman has had this problem for the same length of time that the child has been alive–that is, she has had it since the birth of the child.
  5. The affliction itself probably escapes our attention, because when we, particularly we gentile men, read that she has had a flow of blood for an extended time we don’t immediately connect that to continual vaginal bleeding–yet that must be what it was.  Further, it is not at all uncommon for women to develop extended vaginal bleeding post-partum, and so if she had given birth twelve years ago and was still bleeding, that would be an ailment that would totally disrupt her life but would not be rapidly fatal.
  6. It is also noteworthy that we are told that the man is a principle leader of the synagogue, in Mark 5:22 and Luke 8:41 both of which give his name; the truncated Matthew account says only that he is a leader in 9:18.  However, the fact that he is named–another very unusual feature of the miracle accounts–suggests that the writers expect at least some of the readers to recognize his name.
  7. This fact that he was such a leader would mean that if this is his wife and the mother of his daughter she would have to have been put out of the house–contact with a woman with continual vaginal bleeding would make him continually unclean and unable to perform his duties at the synagogue.  Thus we find her living on the street, even though she once had the means to pay doctors in an effort to solve the problem.  The family has been separated for most of twelve years, the daughter growing up without her mother.
  8. On that, the story of the girl is split in two parts by the story of the woman, and in the first part only her father Jairus is mentioned.  The mother joins the story only after the healing of the woman when Jesus takes her inside with Him in Luke 8:51 and in Mark 5:40.  Luke 8:56 repeats the recognition of the presence of the mother by saying He gave the girl to her parents.
  9. Both of those accounts tell us that when Jesus arrived at the house and went in to see the girl, the mother entered the house with Him.  Why was she not already in the house, at the bedside of her dying daughter?  We might suppose that she had been waiting outside for her husband to return with news about the healer, but it’s a better fit if we see her coming to the house with Jesus and the others because she is the mother who has been excluded from the home for all these years due to her ailment.
  10. It is a very minor point, but all three accounts initially identify the woman with the greek word γυνὴ, which is a tricky word in Greek because of the culture of the time.  It literally means a “woman”.  However, it was the word automatically used to identify a “wife”.  Thus each time the word “woman” appears in the passage it could mean “wife”, that on the way Jesus met a wife, and healed the wife, and the wife told of her affliction and her healing.  It is not conclusive, but it is noteworthy.
  11. It might be argued that after the healing of the woman Jesus told her to leave–but the text does not say that.  In Mark 8:34 he tells her to “retire into peace”, which might mean that she should leave but might rather mean that she should leave her fears behind because she is now healed.  Similarly in Luke 8:48 the statement is “travel into peace”, which could have that meaning, or could mean that she should continue her journey without fear.  That journey might reasonably be taking her home.  Matthew has no statement telling her to leave, only reassurance of her healing.
  12. In all three accounts Jesus makes a point of identifying the woman who was healed.  It is very dramatic covering several verses in both Mark and Luke, but even Matthew makes the point that He found her in the crowd and identified her.  That might have been solely for her benefit, but it makes sense for Him to identify the woman if indeed she is the mother of the girl and her husband has to be aware that she has now been healed and can return to the home.
  13. The fact that Matthew 9:22 tells us that the cure was permanent strongly suggests that the woman did not vanish into the crowd, but that someone was still in contact with her over the years to come.  We aren’t told who she was specifically, but this detail suggests that she must have been someone known within the community, and someone for whom if the condition returned the community would know, which would apply to the wife of the synagogue leader.
  14. On the whole, if the woman is the wife of the synagogue leader and mother of the girl, then this is not one story tucked inside an unrelated other, but the story of Jesus restoring a family, bringing the mother back into the home and saving the life of the daughter.  It is a theory that gives us a whole picture here.

Thus I contend that the woman healed of her bleeding in the middle of the story of the healing of the daughter of the synagogue leader is the mother of the child, the estranged wife of the synagogue leader, being restored to her place in the home as the life of her daughter is saved.

There is a second issue in this passage worth comment (also pointed out to me by the aforementioned David Oldham).  All three accounts tell us that the people at the house believed the girl had died.  Interpreters generally conclude that they were right, that the girl had died and Jesus here restores her to life.  The problem is that Jesus insists that the girl is not dead but sleeping.  He is reported to have said this in Matthew 9:24, Mark 5:39, and Luke 8:52.  We, though, ignore what Jesus said and assume that He was being metaphorical.

Does the context otherwise support this?  It does not say that Jesus restored her to life.  In Matthew 9:25 the verb is that He lifted her, sometimes rendered raised but meaning no more than that He helped her to her feet.  In Mark 5:41 the statement is given in Aramaic but then translated to Greek, the verb here meaning to raise yourself, often used of awakening.  That same Greek verb is used in Luke 8:54.  Both of these verbs are sometimes used metaphorically for awakening the dead, and might be being so used here, but they do not prove the girl was dead rather than comatose.  It is also significant that the Aramaic verb used by Mark does not mean to awaken but to stand, which might again indicate that Jesus believed her to be alive.

Luke 8:55 uses the idiomatic phrase “her spirit returned”, which might be taken to mean that her spirit had left and she was dead.  However, Greek usage suggested that when someone slept their spirit went on a brief trip elsewhere, and that it returned when they awoke, so again we have something inconclusive.

Thus we cannot genuinely prove whether the girl was alive or dead when Jesus reached her, but as my friend suggests on this point we should probably believe what Jesus says.  After all, He seems quite adamant about it.

#474: Preliminary Temporal Thoughts on Paper Girls

This is mark Joseph “young” blog entry #474, on the subject of Preliminary Temporal Thoughts on Paper Girls.

Reader Scott Curtis contacted me to ask,

I am a longtime reader of your articles on time travel cinema.  My wife and I are watching the short lived show Paper Girls on Amazon Prime, and I was wondering if you have taken a look at it?  If so I was wondering if you have considered turning your analytical eye on it.

Quite a few years back I wrote an explanation of Why Not Analyze Time Travel Television Shows? much of which still applies.  Granted, it appears from the Amazon description that Paper Girls is only 8 episodes, but that’s quite a bit of material, and in my current circumstances getting the opportunity to watch a two-hour movie is challenging.

However, I did take a look at the blurb, and ran into an obvious problem.  It tells us that they have to interact with their adult selves.  Let’s consider this.

If they left from 1988 and arrived in 2019, they ceased to exist in time in 1988 and don’t exist in 2019.  Before they can interact with their future selves, they have to return to the past and create future selves.  That means they need an N-jump resolution which they’re not going to get, because the second problem is once they’ve returned to the past and so replaced themselves in history, the world changes drastically around them–let’s face it, four fifteen-year-old girls who live to be forty-six is going to mean some of them marry and/or have children, and we hit the genetic problem in spades.  Further, the selves they meet in the future are going to be the ones who made the trip they are currently making but didn’t find themselves in the future.  This then sets up the problem that they have to return to the past–we need a stable sawtooth snap–and we have to repeat history with versions of themselves who did make that trip, who then are different from having met their older selves when they were younger.  Getting this to stabilize is very complicated.

Further, telling stories in this temporal morass means choosing which timeline, and the only one that will exist beyond their return to the past is the last one.  However, the blurb also says that they have to deal with warring time traveling factions.  Assuming these come from the yet further future, they cannot come into existence until our first anomaly is resolved–our girls have met their younger selves and remember having met their older selves–because only after that can there be a tomorrow.  Then time has to advance to a moment in the future when one of those factions travels into that history between 1988 and 2019, which again changes that history and forces a repeat of their anomaly, which happens again when the other faction arrives attempting to alter history again, and every time one of those future factions travels to any point in the past, even points after 2019, they create ripples in history reaching all the way back to 1988 (because if in 2050 faction A sends someone to 2030 who impacts persons in faction B, when faction B sends someone from 2040 to 2019 that person will be different, impacted by the 2030 visit, and so will impact our four girls differently, changing events flowing from 1988).

I see very little hope for a satisfactory temporal resolution to such a morass, and expect that it’s going to crash into an infinity loop at some point, the end, no future.

If it is not obvious, though, I need to caveat that I have not watched the show; this is entirely based on the descriptive blurb.

Much of this is covered better in the book The Essential Guide to Time Travel, available in paperback and Kindle formats.

Scott adds that the handling of time travel is unlike anything he has seen elsewhere, so I might try to catch a few episodes and that might inspire some additional thoughts on it.

I hope this helps.

473: The Song “In the Light of His Love”

This is mark Joseph “young” blog entry #473, on the subject of The Song “In the Light of His Love”.

This might be the oldest song on the list; it’s probably also the shortest, at least so far.  (I have a couple of very short songs that I never sing, but might figure out how to record sometime.)  Working with a few others back around 1970 plus or minus a year under the name Genuine Junk Parts (with Art Robbins, my brother Roy Young, and Andy Nilssen handling the recording), I put together a collection under the title Genuine Junk Lives in Ramsey, but decided not to try to sell copies because I was worried about copyrights.  Yeah, I was a kid.  This song wrapped up the tape, and is, I think, the only song from that collection that I’ve ever sung publicly since forming The Last Psalm, although there is one other that I’ve tried to remember from time to time.

It was also the last song I recorded for the vocals-over-midi-instruments discs I created for Dave Oldham, because it was a song performed occasionally by The Last Psalm (and at least once before that by BLT Down when we did a church service).  I sing it occasionally to close concerts, and think of it as a benediction.  After all, it’s short–under a minute, forty seconds in this recording.

My wife always comments that she likes the way I rhymed “God’s Son” with “person”.  It’s a very simple song, but then, it’s not really long enough to get that complicated.  I don’t recall anyone else ever commenting on it.

In the Light of His Love.

So here are the lyrics.

The Lord will select you,
Direct you, protect you.
He’ll stay beside you
To hide you or guide you.
He’ll always lead you
And he’ll always feed you,
So stay in the light of His love.

You know that you need Him,
So hear Him and heed Him,
For Jesus is God’s son,
And no normal person.
He’s never far from you
Once He has won you,
So stay in the light of His love.

*****

Previous web log song posts:

#301:  The Song “Holocaust” | #307:  The Song “Time Bomb” | #311:  The Song “Passing Through the Portal” | #314:  The Song “Walkin’ In the Woods” | #317:  The Song “That’s When I’ll Believe” | #320:  The Song “Free” | #322:  The Song “Voices” | #326:  The Song “Mountain, Mountain” | #328:  The Song “Still Small Voice” | #334:  The Song “Convinced” | #337:  The Song “Selfish Love” | #340:  The Song “A Man Like Paul” | #341:  The Song “Joined Together” | #346:  The Song “If We Don’t Tell Them” | #349: The Song “I Can’t Resist You’re Love” | #353:  The Song “I Use to Think” | #356:  The Song “God Said It Is Good” | #362:  The Song “My Life to You” | #366:  The Song “Sometimes” | #372:  The Song “Heavenly Kingdom” | #378:  The Song “A Song of Joy” | #382:  The Song “Not Going to Notice” | #387:  The Song “Our God Is Good” | #393:  The Song “Why” | #399:  The Song “Look Around You” | #404:  The Song “Love’s the Only Command” | #408:  The Song “Given You My Name” | #412:  The Song “When I Think” | #414:  The Song “You Should Have Thanked Me” | #428:  The Song “To the Victor” | #433:  The Song “From Job” | #436:  The Song “Trust Him Again” | #438:  The Song “Even You” | #441:  The Song “Fork in the Road” | #442:  The Song “Call to Worship” | #445:  The Song “How Many Times” | #447:  The Song “When I Was Lonely” | #450:  The Song “Rainy Days” | #453:  The Song “Never Alone” | #455:  The Song “King of Glory” | #457:  The Song “Greater Love” | #458:  The Song “All I Need” | #462:  The Song “John Three” | #464:  The Song “The Secret” | #466:  The Song “In a Mirror Dimly” | #468:  The Song “Present Your Bodies” | #471:  The Song “Walkin'”

Next song: Step by Step

472: Versers Vanish

This is mark Joseph “young” blog entry #472, on the subject of Versers Vanish.

With permission of Valdron Inc I have previously completed publishing my first eight Multiverser novels,

  1. Verse Three, Chapter One:  The First Multiverser Novel,
  2. Old Verses New,
  3. For Better or Verse,
  4. Spy Verses,
  5. Garden of Versers,
  6. Versers Versus Versers,
  7. Re Verse All, and
  8. In Verse Proportion,

in serialized form on the web (those links will take you to the table of contents for each book).  Along with each book there was also a series of web log posts looking at the writing process, the decisions and choices that delivered the final product; those posts are indexed with the chapters in the tables of contents pages.  Now as I am posting the ninth, Con Verse Lea,  I am again offering a set of “behind the writings” insights.  This “behind the writings” look may contain spoilers because it sometimes talks about my expectations for the futures of the characters and stories–although it sometimes raises ideas that were never pursued, as being written partially concurrently with the story it sometimes discusses where I thought it was headed.  You might want to read the referenced chapters before reading this look at them.  Links below (the section headings) will take you to the specific individual chapters being discussed, and there are (or will soon be) links on those pages to bring you back hopefully to the same point here.

This is the fifth and final post for this novel, covering chapters 66 through 85.  Previous behind-the-writings posts for Con Verse Lea include web log posts:

  1. #460:  Versers Reorganize, covering chapters 1 through 17;
  2. #463:  Characters Unsettled, covering chapters 18 through 34;
  3. #365:  Characters Wander, covering chapters 35 through 51.
  4. #470:  Verser Turnings, covering chapters 52 through 68.

There is also a section of the site, Multiverser Novel Support Pages, in which I have begun to place materials related to the novels beginning with character papers for the major characters, giving them at different stages as they move through the books.

History of the series, including the reason it started, the origins of character names and details, and many of the ideas, are in earlier posts, and won’t be repeated here.

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Quick links to discussions in this page:
Chapter 69, Takano 78
Chapter 70, Beam 151
Chapter 71, Hastings 250
Chapter 72, Beam 152
Chapter 73, Takano 79
Chapter 74, Beam 153
Chapter 75, Hastings 251
Chapter 76, Takano 80
Chapter 77, Beam 154
Chapter 78, Takano 81
Chapter 79, Hastings 252
Chapter 80, Beam 155
Chapter 81, Hastings 253
Chapter 82, Beam 156
Chapter 83, Takano 82
Chapter 84, Beam 157
Chapter 85, Takano 83

Chapter 69, Takano 78

I was very uncertain how to handle this, but I began at the beginning and let it unfold as I went.  The song is one I learned as a child, elementary school aged, which eventually enabled me to recall the order of the books before I reached college.

I decided to give a fair amount of the sermon, but to spread it over a few chapters.  I have not yet decided whether the next part will be from Lauren’s perspective or again Tommy’s.

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Chapter 70, Beam 151

I came to this with a complication.  In my mind I had played out the key events of the rescue, but I realized that it was all very much from Ashleigh’s perspective, and Beam wasn’t there.  It took some work to figure out how to tell the rescue from Beam’s perspective and make it interesting.

I gave serious consideration to writing up the rescue from Ashleigh’s perspective and posting it for my Patreon patrons; I put off doing so because of concerns that I finish the book in a reasonable timeframe.

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Chapter 71, Hastings 250

I was going to write the Genesis passage from memory, as I had the John passage, but decided that since Lauren was reading it and I was to some degree relying on the idea that God had provided the same translation to her as to all the others, I went with the updated New American Standard Bible, which I have generally treated as Lauren’s preferred translation, and copied it from my copy.

I also copied the John passage; although I didn’t need to, having memorized it in Greek since having memorized the English in an earlier edition of that translation, I thought I’d better be careful to have it right.

In doing this, I really had very little idea what I was going to cover in this first sermon, and as I proceeded I recognized the technical problems, like the system of chapters and verses.

On my first pass I consciously chose not to use secondary quotes for the passages she was reading aloud, as it would be a tremendous amount, I thought, of clutter.  However, on a read-through edit I decided that when she cites the first words of Genesis as matching John, “in the beginning”, the flow of the text was confusing enough that the reader would be unlikely to realize that it was a quote instead of a statement about the text, so I used the inner quotes for it, but only for it, to clarify.

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Chapter 72, Beam 152

When I started this chapter I had no more idea of where it was going than that Warren would be awaiting them at the cave.  The rest of it was filling in answers to questions that were rattling in my head, and moving the story forward.  It is almost unfortunate that I can’t follow Warren and Amanda, because I’ve a pretty good idea where they’re going and no clue what Beam does next.

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Chapter 73, Takano 79

Again, I came to this chapter with nothing, and as I started to write I decided to segue out of the sermon with Tommy’s reaction to it.  From there I just filled in details of ordinary life and wrapped back around to the significant change.  It was short, but I think it was worth including.

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Chapter 74, Beam 153

The part about having disowned the gem and so being unable to track it was pretty much all I had when I started this chapter, but as I started to type I thought of how to lead up to that, and went from there.

I figured out the trick to figuring out which way Warren and Amanda went–or rather, didn’t go–while writing it.

I originally had said Beam fried up some eggs to go with the rice, but on the read-through I deleted that, because again they didn’t do any cooking in the cave, and although I hadn’t said they were there that was the stated meeting place so I was assuming as much, and thought the reader would also assume that.

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Chapter 75, Hastings 251

For a couple days I was more focused on finishing the setup for In Verse Proportion, and indeed I more than once forgot whose chapter was next–I had been thinking that it was Tommy, and I would do Tommy and then Lauren to make it feel like a longer time before Beam arrived at his destination.  Still, when I got to it, I was pressed for time and wrote the first paragraph, and ran off to other chores.

I still had trouble figuring out what to write, and wound up with a rather short chapter.

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Chapter 76, Takano 80

I had started this chapter, but was stumbling forward, so I went back to re-read everything from the beginning.  As I reached chapter 10, I realized I had a continuity problem:  at that point, there were battery-powered electric lights in the outlaw caves, and they built no fires and did no cooking there.  Yet after Beam rescued Warren they retreated to the cave, where they ate and slept, and there was an oil lamp in the bedroom.  I was going to have to fix that.

I made a couple decisions about the book by the time I’d finished the re-read.  One was that this was going to be a short book, that I was rapidly approaching the end.  I decided that Beam was going to be ambushed, and worked out some details about how that might work; I spent a lot of time trying to come up with a world in which Ashley and Sophia would find it difficult to kill each other, but which also would create an interesting place and restore some of Turbirb’durpa’s abilities.  I am currently thinking about a zombie apocalypse world, and of course there are multiple kinds of zombies.  I was trying to decide whether these would be magic or tech, and Kyler suggested bod-based, some kind of parasite, which is probably what I will choose.

Meanwhile, I am more and more thinking that Lauren will get in a fight with a bear.  I had a player do that once.  The problem is that Lauren probably could defeat a bear–but I think I’ve got the answers to that.  I also gave some consideration to formally retiring her, having her enter heaven–but decided instead to leave her out of the next several books and have the other characters wonder what happened to her.  That way I could still bring her back in some future book if I wished.

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Chapter 77, Beam 154

I realized I had to have a Beam chapter in which they were traveling, and this, although short, accomplished that.  I expected to have one more chapter in this world, and then probably would need to have the first chapter of the next world before the end of the book, but I wanted several more chapters in total, so I was going to have to stretch things.

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Chapter 78, Takano 81

I knew I was bringing the book to an end, and needed to figure out how to bring all three stories to a reasonable resting point.  This was mostly an effort to convey that Lauren had taught Tommy pretty much everything else she could about wilderness survival.

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Chapter 79, Hastings 252

Again I needed to draw the story to a close without it being abrupt, and so I focused on Lauren’s concerns for the days ahead.

I made sassafras tea as a boy.  I used the roots, and although I drank it, I never much cared for it because it had no sugar.  After I wrote the chapter I checked and learned that sassafras is no longer commercially available because it contains low levels of some poison, but I decided Lauren didn’t know that.

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Chapter 80, Beam 155

This was my exit strategy for Beam.  I decided that if the soldiers were thinking that they had to kill the demons, Bob wouldn’t recognize that as a threat to them and wouldn’t give the alert until too late, and enough individual soldiers shooting at Bob and Dawn would kill them both.  Bron was an afterthought, since he was there and I wasn’t certain how to handle him.

The important thing was that Beam should be killed.  I included the discussion about sparing Ashley mostly to give a bit of tinge of evil to the soldier.

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Chapter 81, Hastings 253

I had been sitting on this as a Takano chapter for a few days, unable to move forward.  I was struggling with the fact that I wanted to verse out Lauren and Beam, establish the new world for Beam but not for Lauren, and close with Tommy leading the Bible teaching.  I couldn’t find a way to write an interesting chapter here that was about Tommy.

I once had a player’s character pick a fight with a bear, and he fancied himself an excellent martial artist but realized after the fact that he had severely underestimated the bear.  I don’t remember how that came out.  I did recognize that a few things had to go against Lauren for her to lose, but stripping her of armor and weapons and having her fail to get the shield up in time were enough to tip the balance, I thought.

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Chapter 82, Beam 156

I was trying to get as much of the new world into this as I could without making it feel contrived.  In some ways I succeeded, but I didn’t get as far as the confrontation between Sophia and Ashley.  I thought I was going to have to bounce that to the next book, but then I had similar trouble covering everything I wanted to cover in the next Takano chapter, so I needed another Beam chapter so I could have another Takano chapter after that.

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Chapter 83, Takano 82

I knew I needed to start with Tommy noticing that Lauren was gone, and I wanted to get as far as the Sunday morning meeting—but I realized I couldn’t reasonably include that unless I kept Tommy awake all night or somehow covered the night, so I needed another chapter to complete it.

I had to look up Clark’s name.  I’m a bit uneasy about exactly what equipment Tommy has collected while here (particularly whether she has a bow, a quiver, or arrows), but I’ll piece that together when I do the character sheet updates so I’ll have it ready before she returns, which I think will be book eleven, although I haven’t decided whether she or Beam will be in book ten.

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Chapter 84, Beam 157

I managed to get quite a bit of what I wanted into this chapter.

I have been struggling with the fact that Beam really ought to curse, but I won’t have it in the book; but I decided that I could give Sophia the ability to curse by creating inventive invective for her.  Thus I decided that she could say “in the dregs” as an insult.

This is a zombie apocalypse, and it’s still taking shape in my mind, but I’ve decided that there is a parasite that takes over the body and kills the brain.

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Chapter 85, Takano 83

This end came together in pieces while I was writing the previous several chapters.  I knew that I was going to have Tommy pick up with something from the miraculous resurrection of Lazarus.  I also knew that she was going to have to say something about Lauren’s disappearance, and that she was going to want to meet with the leaders.  It took a bit of coalescing to get that in the right sequence, and I thought it an excellent conclusion to finish with the quote from John.

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This has been the fifth and final behind-the-writings look at Con Verse Lea.  If there is interest and continued support from readers we will endeavor to continue with more behind-the-writings posts and another novel.

471: The Song “Walkin'”

This is mark Joseph “young” blog entry #471, on the subject of The Song “Walkin'”.

Last month I mentioned that that song, Present Your Bodies (linked below), was structurally modeled on this one, specifically mentioning the repetition of the bridge and the way it changes the feel of the music.  I suppose the similarities end there–key, tempo, mood, even the nature of the lyrics are all different.  Yet because of those structural similarities the two songs are connected in my own mind.

As I mentioned then, The Last Psalm had just played its final concert.  I am not at all certain what inspired this song, but I liked it immediately.  Then Jeffrey Robert Zurheide called and invited me to play bass in a band that he was forming mostly to be backup for a Luther alumni classmate named Bruce Henne, and I immediately thought we should include this song.

Jeff and I had met at summer camp, a one-week “sleep-away” music camp sponsored by the United Presbyterian Church and at that time held on the Camp Lebanon campground belonging to the American Baptist Convention, in Lebanon, New Jersey.  Late in 1972 he was driving, and joined my band BLT Down as our lead guitarist and vocalist.  He stayed with the band in 1973 when it transitioned to being The Last Psalm, and for the next eighteen months his “velvet voice” was one of the band’s main attractions.  However, he did not particularly like the spotlight, and in the summer of 1974 he left the band.  Our drummer, John Mastick, persuaded him to play with us at our final reunion concert at Maranatha Church of the Nazarene in New Milford, New Jersey, at the beginning of summer 1975.

Our relationship had a strange quality.  I considered him my best friend, and he was best man at my wedding late in 1976.  On the other hand, as early as February, 1974, he had decided that my musical ambitions had to be reined in, that I shouldn’t sing as much as I did and shouldn’t be seeming to be in the spotlight.  There were several moments after that where Jeff took actions which seemed to be about stifling those ambitions, and in retrospect I often wondered whether this was one of them.  He was seeking someone to play bass guitar and help with the backup vocals in the new band, Jacob’s Well.  I played this song for him, and he immediately said no, he did not want the band to do this one, choosing instead one song from my repertory, When I Think (also linked below, web log post #412).  As I mentioned in discussing that song, I was never enthused about it, and it was all wrong for that band–the piano part was not easily reproduced on a guitar, and it wanted a soaring soprano that was not going to be found in an all-male band.  However, that was the one song from my repertoire that the band included.  This song was shelved.

I have vague recollections of a time a few years later when I met with a few musicians in Delaware through a friend (known as Big Brother Archie Bradley) who were exploring the possibility of including me in their band.  I played this song for them; I don’t remember what others I might have played.  Nothing came of that.

I’ve shied away from performing it solo, because in my mind the vocals are integral to the music–it was written for three vocalists.  However, when I was recording those vocals-over-midi-instruments recordings I included it because I still thought it was well written.  On the other hand, I did not include it on the list of songs to be considered for the Extreme Tour submission.

The piano in this recording is probably irreproducible.  When I was recording it, I felt the background was a bit hollow, but thought that another guitar wouldn’t solve the problem, so I began sketching a racing piano part.  I was working with a software interface that let me in essence put the part on paper and have the computer play it back to me, so I was making it up as I went along.  I’ve never even attempted to play it.  I think I have performed the piece live once or twice, because I like it, but feel like it needs a band.

Walkin’.

So here are the lyrics.

Walkin’ through this world of ours I see so much is wrong.
We’ve got to find a better way, ’cause this just can’t go on!
Brother hates his brother–there must be something else.
The world must surely grieve the Lord, but I’m no good myself.

Some will never understand the things I’m tryin’ to say;
They think that Christ was just a man who lived a special way.
They will never realize ’til the coming of the judgment day,
‘Cause the devil’s had them close their eyes, and they’ve turned their heads away.

We can’t seem to make it–something seems to hold us back.
In trying to be perfect, there is something that we lack.
God has got the answer–He knows that we can’t win:
The blood of Christ poured out for us forgives us for our sin.

Some will never understand the things I’m tryin’ to say;
They think that Christ was just a man who lived a special way.
They will never realize ’til the coming of the judgment day,
‘Cause the devil’s had them close their eyes, and they’ve turned their heads away.

Now I live for Jesus–Jesus lives in me,
And I’m here to heal the eyes of those who cannot see.
Jesus died to save you; He died to save all men,
And although they buried Him, God raised Him up,
God raised Him up again.

Some will never understand the things I’m tryin’ to say;
They think that Christ was just a man who lived a special way.
They will never realize ’til the coming of the judgment day,
‘Cause the devil’s had them close their eyes, and they’ve turned their heads away.

When we choose to follow Him, He leads us day by day.
Because He has forgiven us He hears us when we pray.
Christ was raised to victory when He was crucified.
The key to life abundant is that we have also died.

Now I live for Jesus–Jesus lives in me,
And I’m here to heal the eyes of those who cannot see.
Jesus died to save you; He died to save all men,
And although they buried Him, God raised Him up,
God raised Him up–

Some will never understand the things I’m tryin’ to say;
They think that Christ was just another man, though He lived a special way.
They will never realize ’til the coming of the judgment day,
‘Cause the devil’s had them close their eyes, and they’ve turned their heads away.

Now I live for Jesus–Jesus lives in me,
And I’m here to heal the eyes of those who cannot see.
Jesus died to save you; He died to save all men,
And although they buried Him, God raised Him up,
God raised Him up, God raised Him up again!

*****

Previous web log song posts:

#301:  The Song “Holocaust” | #307:  The Song “Time Bomb” | #311:  The Song “Passing Through the Portal” | #314:  The Song “Walkin’ In the Woods” | #317:  The Song “That’s When I’ll Believe” | #320:  The Song “Free” | #322:  The Song “Voices” | #326:  The Song “Mountain, Mountain” | #328:  The Song “Still Small Voice” | #334:  The Song “Convinced” | #337:  The Song “Selfish Love” | #340:  The Song “A Man Like Paul” | #341:  The Song “Joined Together” | #346:  The Song “If We Don’t Tell Them” | #349: The Song “I Can’t Resist You’re Love” | #353:  The Song “I Use to Think” | #356:  The Song “God Said It Is Good” | #362:  The Song “My Life to You” | #366:  The Song “Sometimes” | #372:  The Song “Heavenly Kingdom” | #378:  The Song “A Song of Joy” | #382:  The Song “Not Going to Notice” | #387:  The Song “Our God Is Good” | #393:  The Song “Why” | #399:  The Song “Look Around You” | #404:  The Song “Love’s the Only Command” | #408:  The Song “Given You My Name” | #412:  The Song “When I Think” | #414:  The Song “You Should Have Thanked Me” | #428:  The Song “To the Victor” | #433:  The Song “From Job” | #436:  The Song “Trust Him Again” | #438:  The Song “Even You” | #441:  The Song “Fork in the Road” | #442:  The Song “Call to Worship” | #445:  The Song “How Many Times” | #447:  The Song “When I Was Lonely” | #450:  The Song “Rainy Days” | #453:  The Song “Never Alone” | #455:  The Song “King of Glory” | #457:  The Song “Greater Love” | #458:  The Song “All I Need” | #462:  The Song “John Three” | #464:  The Song “The Secret” | #466:  The Song “In a Mirror Dimly” | #468:  The Song “Present Your Bodies”

Next Song: In the Light of His Love

470: Verser Turnings

This is mark Joseph “young” blog entry #470, on the subject of Verser Turnings.

With permission of Valdron Inc I have previously completed publishing my first eight Multiverser novels,

  1. Verse Three, Chapter One:  The First Multiverser Novel,
  2. Old Verses New,
  3. For Better or Verse,
  4. Spy Verses,
  5. Garden of Versers,
  6. Versers Versus Versers,
  7. Re Verse All, and
  8. In Verse Proportion,

in serialized form on the web (those links will take you to the table of contents for each book).  Along with each book there was also a series of web log posts looking at the writing process, the decisions and choices that delivered the final product; those posts are indexed with the chapters in the tables of contents pages.  Now as I am posting the ninth, Con Verse Lea,  I am again offering a set of “behind the writings” insights.  This “behind the writings” look may contain spoilers because it sometimes talks about my expectations for the futures of the characters and stories–although it sometimes raises ideas that were never pursued, as being written partially concurrently with the story it sometimes discusses where I thought it was headed.  You might want to read the referenced chapters before reading this look at them.  Links below (the section headings) will take you to the specific individual chapters being discussed, and there are (or will soon be) links on those pages to bring you back hopefully to the same point here.

This is the fourth post for this novel, covering chapters 52 through 68.  Previous behind-the-writings posts for Con Verse Lea include web log posts:

  1. #460:  Versers Reorganize, covering chapters 1 through 17;
  2. #463:  Characters Unsettled, covering chapters 18 through 34;
  3. #468:  Characters Wander, covering chapters 35 through 51.

There is also a section of the site, Multiverser Novel Support Pages, in which I have begun to place materials related to the novels beginning with character papers for the major characters, giving them at different stages as they move through the books.

History of the series, including the reason it started, the origins of character names and details, and many of the ideas, are in earlier posts, and won’t be repeated here.

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Quick links to discussions in this page:
Chapter 52, Takano 73
Chapter 53, Beam 143
Chapter 54, Hastings 246
Chapter 55, Takano 74
Chapter 56, Beam 144
Chapter 57, Takano 75
Chapter 58, Beam 145
Chapter 59, Hastings 247
Chapter 60, Beam 146
Chapter 61, Takano 76
Chapter 62, Beam 147
Chapter 63, Hastings 248
Chapter 64, Beam 148
Chapter 65, Takano 77
Chapter 66, Beam 149
Chapter 67, Hastings 249
Chapter 68, Beam 150

Chapter 52, Takano 73

This was marked for a Hastings chapter, and I was at least several days trying to decide how to proceed.  The problem was that meticulous coverage of everything Lauren needed to teach them would be dull, but at the same time skimming over it in Lauren’s viewpoint would have to be detailed.  I then realized that Lauren would also be setting aside prayer time, which I would prefer were covered third-person.  So I changed the heading to Tommy.

Most of it was thought of as I finally got around to typing something, again several days after I changed it to Tommy’s viewpoint.  I’m contemplating how to get a Bible to her, and have been considering a sort of magic technological solution.

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Chapter 53, Beam 143

I had known for a while that I needed this to be a trap, but couldn’t decide how it would work.  My first thought was some kind of portcullis dropping to block the exit, but it seemed too primitive and ineffective.  My second thought was that the enemy would have rigged the first room to explode and collapse, but that would be complicated and possibly beyond what they were able to do.  I discussed it with Kyler, who reminded me that when he was in this world, the thing that ultimately took him out of it was an ambush, so I went with that.

I am not certain whether Beam will survive the ambush.  It was obvious that Beam has more assets than Kyler had, most notably the early warning system of Bob.  The upside of surviving the ambush is that this world still offers numerous opportunities for action, and I’m not at all certain where I might send him next.  The downside is if this doesn’t kill him I’m not sure what will.  But I don’t have to make that decision yet.

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Chapter 54, Hastings 246

I was pondering what to do with Lauren at this point.  However, I had just had Tommy thinking about getting a Bible somehow, and realized that at some point Lauren has to deliver the gospel to these people.  It was still a few days on top of the previous few days in which I pondered what to do, but once I started writing the chapter came fairly smoothly.

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Chapter 55, Takano 74

I was going to make this a Beam chapter, but my brain was engaged in the next step for the Hastings/Takano story, and I still had not quite worked through what Beam was going to do, so I went with Tommy.  Besides, Tommy’s chapter count was significantly lower than the others, and I sort of felt she needed to catch up a bit.

This chapter sort of moved from one thing to another, but it covered a lot of important parts.  I know what happens next for Tommy, but I needed a break before that could happen.

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Chapter 56, Beam 144

It struck me that Beam’s best strategy would be to take out the leadership, but that he had no way of knowing who or where that was.  Then I realized that Turbirb’durpa could hear the thoughts of the leaders, and so know what the leader was thinking—but would that enable him to locate the leader?  I decided that yes, he did know whence the thoughts came, and as I started writing I recalled his actions back in his first appearance, where he was aware of the location of those whose thoughts he heard.  That enabled Beam to target the leader, because Bob could point him in the right direction.

I always thought that a rocket was the best choice here.  I had often considered using rockets, but always saved them, and after I had fired the rocket I looked up Dawn’s equipment list to find that there were half a dozen, which meant five left.  I wasn’t going to use them all here, but it also said several crates of grenades, and I remembered her grenade launcher, so I used that to blow holes in the enemy line.

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Chapter 57, Takano 75

I had already written several chapters at one sitting, but I had this, and Lauren’s speech, in mind since I started with Lauren being told it was time.  I knew that somehow Tommy was going to manage to get Bibles delivered despite the fact that they couldn’t get anything delivered, and this was that.  The rest was for continuity.

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Chapter 58, Beam 145

I wasn’t sure how this would work, but pieced it together on the fly.  Every paragraph was devised as I reached it, from the marching order to the fight to the decision to follow Warren’s lead.

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Chapter 59, Hastings 247

When I wrote that God had already given her the words, I had this opening in mind.  I’m not an evangelist, either, but I tried to piece together enough of a message for her to deliver.  I also decided early that the truck would arrive with the Bibles during her speech, and it made sense for that to end her speech, but to do so once she had said everything she needed to say.

The embossed Bible was a last-minute decision.  I knew she would get a new Bible at this point, but since they were being distributed to the mass of people I wanted a reason why this one wasn’t also given away, and making it different and putting her name on it would do that for me.

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Chapter 60, Beam 146

At this point I was trying to figure out how to wrap up Beam’s story here, and Lauren’s also, and where to send either of them next.  I wasn’t coming up with any decent ideas.

The chapter was short, because I actually had not solved the problems it posed.

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Chapter 61, Takano 76

I had been contemplating what direction to take with this chapter, and it struck me that Tommy had just had a prayer answered rather dramatically.  It struck me that she had technically worked a miracle, and she might wonder about that.

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Chapter 62, Beam 147

I had decided after I wrote the previous Beam chapter that the best place for Warren was going to be the caves, and that would be an acceptable temporary camp for the others.  I also realized that Warren and Ashleigh ought to be dressed in their outlaw garb, and that they did not store these in the same location, and it would be rude for Beam to ask where Warren kept his.  So I would have to split the party.

Once I knew that I would be separating Warren from the others, it struck me that Beam should give him one of those unimportant pieces of equipment so he could track him by scriff sense.  I wondered what he had, and all I could think of was that he had packed gems in The Dancing Princess; still, I checked his character sheet, and although there were other things such as pencils, I decided the gem was the best choice.  That caused me to think that he should also give one to Ashleigh, because even though I wasn’t expecting them to be separated, he wouldn’t know that with certainty and would decide it a good idea to have a backup plan.  I might have been influenced by the fact that I had within the last week posted Brown 208 (In Verse Proportion Chapter 41), in which Derek says, “one thing I’ve learned is that it’s better to have a backup plan than to wish you had one, even if it’s not a very good backup plan,” which I thought was an excellent quotable statement, even though I don’t think I ever mentioned that anywhere.

I had expected this chapter to take me to the caves, and possibly beyond, but the part about the gems filled it sufficiently that I didn’t want to overstretch it.

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Chapter 63, Hastings 248

I really only had the starting point, that Lauren would be asked questions about the Bible that people were now reading, and that Tommy would kill and cook something.  I decided on rabbit because I wanted it not to be fish and I thought deer was a bit too big.

The meal gave me the start into expanding the diet.  I’ve had some survival training, so I know a fair amount about what you can forage in the woods, but Lauren does not have that benefit, so I had to think a lot about what she would know was edible.

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Chapter 64, Beam 148

I had been ignoring Beam’s most disabling weakness, and as I began with thoughts of returning to the honeymoon suite I realized that he was going to have to eat, and that meant drink, and that with the need to wash down the rice and his weakness for alcohol, he was going to consume a lot of sake and effectively derail his romantic intentions.  But that wasn’t going to appear quite so obvious unless I had him awaken in the bed.  Once I did that, it struck me that I needed a reason for him to get out of the bed, and there was a somewhat obvious one, but there were also obstacles.  And so this chapter took shape.  I’m not certain what happens when he returns.

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Chapter 65, Takano 77

I sort of stumbled through this chapter, knowing only that at some point I wanted Lauren to bring back another, smaller, deer, and that she was going to initiate Bible teaching meetings.  I didn’t even expect the latter to be in this chapter, but as I was writing it arose naturally, so I included it.

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Chapter 66, Beam 149

I decided after I sent Beam to the latrine that when he returned Ashleigh would be awake and awaiting, and much of this was sketched in my mind before I wrote the previous Takano chapter–but I had to pad it a bit, because what I had was too short.

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Chapter 67, Hastings 249

I had no idea what I was going to do with this chapter, and slept on it.  I came to the idea that Lauren was going to realize she had committed herself to lead church, which she had never done nor felt called to do.  It was after I had started writing that I remembered she had taught Bible in the mutant earth world where she met Derek.  Then I gave her margins in the Bible to make notes, but realized that although she had paper she didn’t actually have a pen–she didn’t bring a quill or ink from the fantasy Arabia world.  I also checked Tommy equipment, confirming that she didn’t have anything of that sort, either.  That meant I had to explain Lauren’s notes in the margins of the Bible she gave to Tommy, but that was easy enough.

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Chapter 68, Beam 150

I started this chapter with nothing more than the first line and a few vague notions of what had to be done in the short term.  I developed as much as I could of the plan from there.

I had to look up Amanda’s name, and also what it was that she called Beam, because she had been off stage for so long.

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This has been the fourth behind-the-writings look at Con Verse Lea.  If there is interest and continued support from readers we will endeavor to continue with more behind-the-writings posts and another novel.